Strength of a Woman

They say women are the backbone of their families and that “behind every great man is a great woman”. I embrace the notion of support, but I reject the idea that we must walk around with the stigma that we have to hold everything and everyone together. When we give away all our strength, how do we rejuvenate and keep ourselves mentally healthy?  What are you using to define your strength as a woman? Is your definition of strength being dictated by what society says it should be? Or have you genuinely recognized what makes you strong? We all define our strengths differently and that is great!  We must take the time to define it.

 Your strength is not defined by your ability to hold in your hurt or by the way you hide your pain behind closed doors. It is not your ability to suppress and ignore the hurt that was caused by your childhood trauma.  Burying it will continue to cause a storm throughout your journey. I do not believe it is defined by the way you take care of everybody else’s emotional well-being while your emotions are in ruins.

Often, we run around loving on everybody else and forgetting to stop and love ourselves. We feel unloved because we are pouring out more than we get. It is not to say that we should not love, and or we should not give, but we must examine the quality of what we are giving from an empty cup? Fill your cup first so that you can serve and support others from an overflow.

We make excuses about why we must be strong, and we do not embrace our vulnerability even though our soul needs it desperately. I understand that our minds often reject the idea of truth, openness, and vulnerability because of fear. But how freeing would it be to just say out loud, “I am not okay today”?  Are you allowing yourselves to be the queen you were born to be? I am referring to allowing your needs to be taken care of. Allowing someone to take the wheel and relinquish that control. We are moving so fast that we cannot even see the fruits of our labor. Are you mindfully enjoying what matters most?

So, what is my strength? It is my calm, my peace, and my ability to walk through a fire of chaos and confusing unscathed. When I accept and live in gratitude for the little things, that makes me strong. I love hearing my family talk, laugh, and just be! It is then that the smile on my face permeates through my body and provides me with energy.  My strength is in my ability to cry, to say no, to set boundaries, and ask for help because I am overwhelmed.

I pull strength from the hurt from my past and I overcome by sharing with others.  I get strength from other women who are searching for strength, just by the support I offer. My biggest source of strength comes from my belief that God guides me through it all. That when I go with the flow, the flow will go with me. I stand firm on my values and I throw out the beliefs that no longer work for me. I no longer wear the mask it is the vulnerable honest truthful me that defines my strength.